I'm hoping you all have some great suggestions (especially those who have been pregnant after a loss) for how to best get through each day/each week - waiting and hoping you stay pregnant and everything is okay - and not worrying a lot.
I'm doing okay but I'd like to do some very deliberate things to help pass the time in the most positive way possible. I could always stay busy (but I can tend to be too busy) and I want to exercise (I know it will help) but I'm kind of scared (even of moderate walking).
I would greatly appreciate your help!
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5 comments:
Hi, I'm Danielle and I had a healthy baby boy almost 1 year to the day after I lost my daughter at 28 weeks. A friend of mine had asked if I would come along and read your blog. First Congratulations and take a deep breath. As much as you don't want to worry, there truly is no avoiding it. You just make sure your proactive with every aspect of this pregnancy. Enjoy the life growing inside, and if you fear something is wrong call the dr. Really that is all you can do. For now its the waiting game. For me true confirmation of the pregnancy arrived at 6 weeks when I got to see and hear the heartbeat. I'll be praying for you that when you do see your baby, all is well. If you wish to email me I'd be happy to share my experience with you. dleacock@juno(dot)com. God Bless you on your journey.
~ My best,
Danielle
Congratulations on your pregancy. I was referred over here by the same friend as Danielle. I had 6 losses before we were blessed with our beautiful daughter. During her pregancy, I;d love to say I had a trick, but as Danielle said, there is no way to avoid the worry. It one more person had told me to relax, everything would be fine, I was going to knock em flat out on the floor. :o)
One thing I did do was to frequently put one hand on the baby and the other on my heart. I just envisioned the love from my heart going through my hands and to the baby. I would talk to her and tell her how much I wanted to meet her.
Like you, I had thought, that's it... I am done. I had gone to a website about life without children. I had started to think about where I could make new friends who didn't have kids. I was looking to find a new circle of people who weren't always talking about their kids, etc. One website I found I thought would really help. TO be honest, the reception I got was far from welcoming because I had been pregnant so many times. In a sense, I was shocked how nasty these women were and I decided, that is not me. I am not going to let this change my life, make me make new friends, make me into a bitter person like these women. I decided that I had it in me to keep trying.
Well, then came our 7th pregnancy and for the first time ever, at 8 weeks, I saw an ultrasound with a beating heart. It was, at that time, the most emotional experience of my life. That was until August 20th. When I heard my daughter cry and they said "it's a girl" (we didn't know before), that was the best moment EVER. It made all of the tears, heartache, panic, fear... it made every bit of it so worth while.
I will be folowing your blog and hope that you have the baby of your dreams in your arms soon.
Look how cool you are--people you don't even know are finding you to provide support!
Where have I been! (See email for details) Anyways....Holly Molly!
How exciting!The last blog I read was "moving on". I so happy to hear different.
I think the two ladies said it all with how to handle the day to day emotions. By taking them day by day.
I can't stop smiling.
Congratulations! I "found" your blog because I read LauraC's blog (I'm a fellow Mama of Twins). I wanted to comment on this post because I look back and regret that I didn't allow myself to enjoy my pregnancy more. We waiting far to long to do anything relating to the babies "just in case" things didn't work out. If I could go back and do it all again I would have just allowed myself to be happy and excited about FINALLY being pregnant. I'm also an infertility treatment success story - we had many losses prior to getting pregnant with the girls so it was REALLY difficult to let go and allow myself to become "attached" to the pregnancy. So - simply put...my advice would be to not delay doing things (like getting the nursery ready, etc...) and to just be HAPPY that you're finally pregnant. Pay special attention to the do not delay part because you could very well end up on bed rest and be hating yourself for not doing stuff sooner! ALSO - the BIGGEST advice I can give post birth of twins is USE BIRTH CONTROL. I was told that I pretty much had NO chance of conceiving "naturally" so hubby and I were never really careful. Well....my twin girls are 2.5 and I'm 7 months pregnant with a SURPRISE baby boy. I've heard of my situation happening with WAY to many Moms and always thought - oh, that won't happen to me - just be careful *SMILE*. I look forward to following your twin pregnancy :-)
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